Just me

In my younger years my first natural instinct to follow the big kids became an obsession.

‘If they did this I tried to do it too but only better.

‘If they played this I tried to play it too, but actually wanted to win at it.’

It was as if my kiddy years consumed of endless amounts of wanting to fit in, and all I could do was follow, follow, follow.

Which would of been alright if I wouldn’t of choked on what I thought was a honey suckle, but was actually a sticky, spiky gesture of it. I should’ve known the difference between the two, but I guess I was unfortunately naive. I remember wanting to prove to my big sister that I could pick out my own things from now on.

Little did I know I was wrong, because before I knew it my parents were high telling me to the store to get a coke. My mother claimed it would help due to acidic base of it all. I guess she was right considering I’m still here, but that isn’t where these misfortune events end for me.

Two unexplained car wrecks, a trip down the stairs, a falling out of the car hitting my head leaving a mark,etc…

I was about the age of 12 when I first drowned. And I don’t remember much after that. Just a water phobia left for me and permanent anxiety problems.

Which